January 14, 2008

• No Common Sense…….

  This last weekend sure has been interesting to say the least.  My stepdaughter came from Indiana to finally get her household goods from storage that she placed there about two years ago give or take a few months.  I was hoping that she would also be able to take her 4 wheeler that she is storing on our property too but fate has decreed that she will not be taking it this trip.  It seems it was decided that she would not need her sway(?) bars for her hauler to get the goods back to Indiana……..Wrong!  Lucky for her, the sway bars on our camper were able to be fitted for her hauler…….not that she was that thankful for the help she got.  Knowing that we had to go about an hour and a half from our home to get coal for our coal stove to heat our house, she “allowed” her cell phone to go dead.  Orginally, we were to wait for her call to meet her at the storage facility in the morning and then go get our coal.  After my Husband tried repeatly to call her on her cell, he decided to just go get the coal and when she contacted us, make new arrangements to meet at the storage facility since the coal place did not stay open much after 12.  We had driven to the coal place, bagged and loaded the coal, went to a restaurant and had breakfast with our niece, Connie, like we had made the arrangements with a week before, said our goodbyes to Connie and gotten into our car before my daughter Jessica called us with the news that my stepdaughter had finally called.  My stepdaughter wanted her Dad to call her mother’s cell phone so she could talk to him.  Stop the World……..Hell will Freeze Over First!!!!  My stepdaughter’s mother is the “(Insert word describing a worthless sorry excuse for a totally selfish human being) who tried to use an affair with my Husband to destroy our marriage.  My Husband dialing her cell phone is not going to happen especially with me right there with him since knowing her, she will answer the phone first before she gives it over to her daughter.   The joke was on them though since my husband on his own, erased her number from his phone and does not even remember what her number was since she was always on his speed dial once my stepdaughter announced that she only had six month to live…….over two years ago.  No folks……no miracle involved.  The doctor told her that if she did not get medical help for her medical Lupus related problems she only had about 6 months to live.  She got the medications that she needed and the problems were corrected…….with her still having Lupus of course.  I researched Lupus and found that if you take care of yourself and do not aggrevate your condition, you can live a long and productive life.  It all depends on your attitude and your willingness to abide by the guidelines set out for individuals with Lupus to help them stay healthy.  I know people that had and have Lupus and they have lived to ripe old ages.  The ones that I have met have also worked and had productive lives and even retired from their jobs with pensions.  Having Lupus is not an automatic early death sentence, you can have Lupus and still die from something else…….even old age.    All that just to explain why a number is on a cell phone!  Anyways, after I found out about them having an affair which shortly ended thereafter since my Husband realized that he had made a mistake….a BIG mistake…..and he told her he was not leaving me for her.  So him calling her number would have been totally inappropriate even if he knew the number and my stepdaughter at 30+ years should have known better to even have suggested such an action.   He refused to call the number and had Jessica call the number that my stepdaughter had called from and had Jessica tell her to plug in her cell phone and call him when it got charged since it would take us at least an hour to get home and to unload the coal.  Arrangements were made to meet and my Husband and I set out to meet her at the storage facility.  We arrived first and then another car pulled in with a male driver.  It wasn’t until the driver got out that he was recognized as my Husband’s son.  He had gained quite a bit of weight.  While he was talking to his son….with me sitting in the car since it was cold with a drizzling kind of rain plus his son blames me for my son Joshua not wanting anything to do with him.  I stay out of that one since I tried to reconcile the two young men and my son Josh told me to back off that he wasn’t ready to have anything to do with his half brother and it was his decision as to when or if that would ever happen.  By now, I figure my Husband’s son blames me for all the problems in the world to include global warming since I am safe to blame everything on…….and, of course, someone has to be blamed…….since nothing is ever his mother’s fault……ever!  Then another car comes in ……..and sure enough…..my stepdaughter is in the car……but her mother is driving.  I am sure she was not too happy to see me there but she was smart enough to stay in her car.  While we were there, family drama erupted again.  My stepson walks by yelling and if he could spit nails he would have.  I heard him tell his sister how dare she say that no one would help her.  She quickly got into his face saying that is not what she said.  She then told him that what she said was “God forbid that someone should help her”.  Her brother then said that it is not our fault that you moved three states away from the people that love her and could help her.  She said something in the nature that she moved there so she could get treatment.  He then said,  “Come on, (Sister’s Name), you never went there for treatment…..it was all about Rhonda.”  I agree with my stepson…..especially about treatment since we (and this included the stepdaughter) live in an area that has several large hospitals to also include two teaching hospitals.  Treating Lupus is not as complicated as …..separating twins that are joined together or other more complicated illnesses.  Lupis is not a rare disease and a lot of people are afflicted with it.  Not to downplay it…..but there is so many worse things that can go wrong with a person that if you had to have an illness, this is one that can be worked with.  My Husband heard all the yelling an started going over to them but I told him he should stay out of it since this was a sibling thing.  They went at it hot an heavy for a few more minutes and then they walked away from each other to cool down since they both went into emotional overload and cleared alot of baggage in a very short bit of time.  My stepson went to his car and my stepdaughter walked to the end of the building.  Once again, disappointment came her way since her mother hurried to her brother’s side once again choosing her brother over her.  My Husband went to his daughter to make sure that she was OK but to also tell her that we would meet them at the house.  He had learned not to get sucked into the sibling rivalry between the two that the stepson does not even know that his sister is engaged in.  She says she loves her brother but I have heard her tell us things that she has done to him that that does not demonstrate a loving attitude when he is not around and I just know made Life harder for him.  Not my place to introvene but my Husband’s…….his call.  If one of my kids had done what she did, I would have told the sibling and confronted my child and held them accountable for their actions.   Then again, if any of my kids had done such a thing, they would not have let me know since they know what kind of Mother I am……I may not always want to do it, but when it comes to the Mom thing……I am the Mom and it is part of the job description.  Anyways……….her mom leaves with her brother and she takes her Mom’s car with Roger following in the truck with the hauler.  Roger, by the way, is an older gentleman from Mississippi who is a sweetheart and is so polite in that southern kind of way and is helping my stepdaughter out of the goodness of his heart.  I hope he enjoyed visiting New York even with all the drama.  While stepdaughter was visiting I was polite though I believe she has a lot to answer to since it is my belief that she was an active participant in trying to break up my marriage with her Father.  She is now saying that she is not involved in anyway.  I disagree.  I do not see any reason for her mother to have come to the storage facility when she knew my Husband was going to be there.  My stepdaughter could have driven herself since she did drive herself from the storage facililty to our home and then returned to her mother’s house and hour and 15 minutes away.  While she was at our house, she called her mother and made arrangements to meet for dinner upon leaving our house in full view and hearing of myself and my daughter Jessica.  When my Husband came in from fixing her hauler and asked her to go out to dinner, she just refused and then finally telling him that she had made other plans.  She had been staying with her mother since Thursday night and this was Saturday evening.  I was hurt for my husband since I love him and I know the sacrifices he has made for his daughter…..not that she has ever really appreciated any of them.  While she was in my house, she also made arrangements for her mother to bring her, Roger, and my granddaughter by my stepdaughter’s partner Sunday morning to my house since the truck and hauler was staying at our house(I really don’t know why….maybe to save on gas since they would have to come back the same way to go to Indiana).  They were suppose to be leaving really early in the morning so when we got up to go to church we were surprised to see the hauler still there.  My Husband went to take a shower and while he was doing that…….they arrived.  As I watch, my stepdaughter’s mother prances her “ham hocks” onto MY PROPERTY.  What idiot has an affair with a woman’s husband and then goes on that woman property knowing she is there?  A Blithering Idiot?  I was nice.  I just went to my front door, leaned out and in a commanding voice, said, “Linda….Get….Off…..MY…..Property!  I made sure I spoke slowly spacing my words out so that there was absolutely no question of my intent or intentions.  She got very Smart very very Quickly…….and took her “ham hocks” back into her car and then left.  My Husband came out of the shower about that time and thought I was talking to him.  When I told him what I had done……he started laughing.  It is my intention to make out formal papers making it possible that if she ever….ever….comes on my property again that she will be arrested for trespassing.  There is absolutely no reason for her to come on our property.  If she wants to meet up with her daughter, she can meet her at the local 24 hour restaurant just down from our house when her daughter is visiting with us.  My children do not understand how I can be polite to my stepdaughter when she is here since they know I have issues with her and her involvment in my marriage and the way she treats my Husband.  Just because he is used to the way she treats him, it does not make it right and though he says it does not bother him, I think it is more like he does not let himself think about it since then he would be hurt.  I love him and do not like ANYONE hurting him but I am letting him deal with it.  I believe he has the right to have a relationship with his kids like I have a right have a relationship with my kids.  I treat his children the way I hope he would treat mine…..no more, no less.  The relationships he has with his children is his own doing…..good or bad….his choice.  While my stepdaughter was here, I let her see the video of the renewal of our wedding vows  that my Husband surprised me with on our anniversary New Year Eve.  I wanted her to actually see the love in his face and voice for me and to see the new rings that he picked and purchased all on his own for us.  I wanted her to see that he is here with me because he loves me and is willing to go the extra mile to make up to me for the mistake he made.  Evidently the message did not get through or she would have told her mother to stay in the car or at least stay on the public road since we live on a dead end road and there is no traffic.    This will not happen again! 

  • 5:37 am
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